How do I look in this “y’all”?

This post title only works with the punctuation.

Little Sir and I are moving to Texas.

Yep, the land of “y’all” and “fixin’ to”.

 

As Little Sir has taken to saying lately, “What in the hay-noney?!”

I knew I was leaving the Santa Cruz Mountains, but I didn’t know where. Lots of areas were up for consideration. And Texas was only one. It was kind of like picking baby names, I had a list and Texas kept rising to the top (I used to live there).

And now here it is, the final decision.

And it feels great. It was kind of funny because Texas kept presenting itself and I kept resisting it. I scheduled a trip there that I kept calling a “scouting” trip. But several weeks ago, I stopped saying that and the waffling and the resistance and the feigned indecision also stopped.

I resisted it because in some ways it doesn’t make sense. Yet in more ways, it makes perfect sense. And it was with that knowingly knowingness that I finally accepted the rightness of it.

And it has continued to be right.  As I made that decision, so many things began to fall into place. It was startling. And blessed. It was good.

Though, I will say, the higher good. I know it’s the right decision the way I have known other sure things in my life. But, I say higher good because it is not without its hard parts. My Grandma cried. My sister has cried twice. I had to say goodbye to friends and as the moment arrived, I felt sort of panicky. That feeling when you’ve waited in line for the roller coaster, but then they lower the bar over your shoulders and you almost shout “WAIT! I need more time!” Yea, that.

As I packed up the cabin, I had to make hard choices about items to leave behind.

And some of what I am leaving behind isn’t so bad. But it was also limited in ways I found frustrating. I’m moving to a life that holds no guarantees. There is no certainty ahead, but it holds the possibility of everything. And like my Grandpas taught me, I’m not going to get to the end and say “I wonder what it would have been like had I…”

I want to pursue the possibilities of the life I want, even at the risk of…well, everything.

And so…with that…

We’re moving to Texas, y’all.