Never Say Never

Never say never. If I believed God worked this way I’d tell you the quickest way to get God’s attention is to utter the word “never”. It’s like he swivels is head around, cocks an eyebrow and says, “Oh, really? Never, huh. We’ll see about that.” And then BAM! The very thing you said would never happen or you’d never do, happens.

But I don’t believe God works like that. So, it’s not God, but there does seem to be some force at work that hears the word “never” as a dare.

I’ve eaten so many crow-flavored nevers. Here are just a few:

I’ll never get married.

I’ll never have children.

I’ll never let myself be in a physically abusive relationship.

I’ll never get divorced.

I’ll never yell at my kids. (This one encapsulates about 100 “never”s around parenting.)

I’ll never love an addict.

I’ll never get remarried.

I’ll never get divorced again.

I’ll never be a stay at home mom.

I’ll never leave this job.

I’ll never live where the weather can kill you.

I’ll never homeschool.

I’ll never fall in love again.

I’ll never move away from California.

I’ll never have money issues.

I’ll never get another chance.

I’ll never stop loving (insert various people I definitely stopped loving here).

I’ll never forgive (insert all the names of the forgiven).

I’ll never lose this weight.

I’ll never regain that weight.

I’m never writing again.

I’ll never not write again.

I’ll never doubt God.

I’ll never believe in God.

I don’t think all nevers are created equal. Some are said in youth. Some are said in judgment of others. Some are said from pain. Some are said in fear. Some are a prayer, a plea. Please, dear God in heaven, never again…

Some are said from strength, I have learned the lesson…

Some nevers are said, well, I’m getting old enough now, some are said because I know the truth of mortality.

And some will be said again and again because life is not a point in time, frozen like Neverland where no one grows up and stays the same.

Life moves and is full of change. And that changes the  nevers.