The Best and Worst of Times

Isn’t it odd how life can offer the sweetest and most bitter of flavors all at the same time? It’s like those jelly beans that come in the lovely berry and lemon flavors and also flavors like vomit.

Lemon Twist has released and that story means so much to me and I’ve been through so much with it and I just feel more pleased than I can express about it being out in the world.

Gorgeous Gal came to visit. I haven’t seen her since August and we’ve both had some big grown up experiences since then and it felt good to hug her and see her sparkling blue eyes with my green ones.

And Grandma June is dying.

And I get it. It’s what happens. It’s one of life’s certainties. And she is receiving good care. And I am so blessed to have had her this long.


And it is awful.

And I don’t know what to fill with the space in my world that she has occupied my whole life.

When I was about 2, I was hospitalized. I have several memories of that time- most of them scary and lonely. I was in a room that was very dark and my Grandma June came to visit. She brought me a clown that you could lace up his shoe and zip his vest and button his coat– you know, one of those busy dolls.

She was like that. Just had the right thing. She was the one who actually collected the box tops you had to have to get the cool prize from the cereal box. Come to think of it, she had the best cereals. No other house let me have those sweet cereals. She worked at Macy’s and the shopping trips with her were legend. She loves butterflies and I have taken to wearing them– they’re not my thing, but she is.

It’s the best of times. It’s the worst of times.