How to Avoid a Lawsuit

I read about this case where kids sued their mother for being a bad mother. Evidence presented included missed birthday gifts.

The lawsuit alleged that the mother had inflicted emotional distress on her children. Having had a mother and now having been a mother, I have this to say:

Duh.

Of course she did. It’s what we do.

This is exactly why I started saving for my kids’ therapy fund years ago.

Therapy funds are an overlooked market for investing. We have college funds. There’s even that woman in the UK who is saving for her daughter’s (who is 7) eventual boob job.

But the best way we can invest in our kids’ future (and protect ours) is by saving for their therapy.

With my first, I wanted to do everything perfect. I wanted her to feel loved, valued and secure each and every single day. And I tried. I really did.

But then her bed broke. She was about four and I thought she was coming up with delay tactics and sternly told her to go back to bed. I went to check on her later and saw her sleeping at a 45 degree angle. Her boxsprings had indeed slid off the frame and there she was perched there like some sort of possum. Cute anecdote? Ha!  In the hands of the right lawyer that is a gold mine!

Then there was the award ceremony we missed. She was an active member of the Boys and Girls club. She was so awesome, they wanted to give her an award at a special banquet. And it was a surprise. So they didn’t tell anyone. Including me. They mailed a letter to our OLD address which we never got. So, she goes to the club the following Monday to realize she missed the whole wonderful thing. I felt so bad, I was the one who needed therapy.

Then there was the fight over coloring Easter eggs when she was a teenager. I had all the dyes, stickers and three dozen eggs boiled and ready for their artistic transformations. My daughter wanted to go to her boyfriend’s instead. Whaaaat? And miss our special family moment celebrating Christ’s resurrection with chicken eggs and food coloring? Uh, no. How did we celebrate our Savior’s miracle instead? Yelling. Her. Me. Lots of yelling. She locked herself in her room all day. No eggs. No boyfriend. Happy Freakin’ Easter to Us!

As the judge said in his ruling in that lawsuit, there was nothing intentional though. Despite my best of intentions, there were just the days I was tired, busy, uncertain or plain wrong.

I’ll stop here because I don’t want to further incriminate myself. But having raised one child to adult status (or so she tells me) and another yet to go, I’m doubling up on my contributions to that therapy fund.