I don’t know why I worry about getting old. One of my first jobs after high school was working in a retirement facility- mostly the skilled nursing level. That could be it. I am really close to my Grandparents and have watched them age and all but The Grandmas, pass on to what comes next. So, that could be it.
I don’t know, but I do think about it a lot.
And when I saw this story about Harper Lee’s new book. I felt so sad. I mean, there is a kernel- a bright shiny nugget- that hopes it reflects her talent like To Kill a Mockingbird does. That it adds a jewel to her crown, not tarnish it. But given her reticence since publishing Mockingbird and some of the other news items that have come out, I am worried for her.
I am worried she is not making decisions the way she would if not deeply affected by age (and its associated maladies) and that she doesn’t have an advocate realizing it for her. If the handwriting is on the wall– well, this seems sloppy. It just raises too many questions (please read the story).
I’ve had a situation in my family that required stepping in. And it is so hard.
It’s hard to step in. Because doing so often means stepping on toes, calling out the elephants, and breaking the egg shells… all of it messy and uncomfortable.
Even for me. The mouthy one.
But once you step in and then go about cleaning up the mess of bloody toes, elephant dung, and broken egg shells– it is better.
I hope I’m wrong about Ms. Lee’s new book (I am reading it now and will post about it.) I hope someone is there for Ms. Lee the way someone should be there for all of us.
PS: Please get your will, health directive, and durable power of attorney paperwork in order. Have a conversation with more than one relative about what you exactly want and don’t want and then write it down. It is not morbid, it is not too soon, will not jinx you, and yes, you do have enough of an estate for it to be worth it.